The Actual Surgery and Aftermath

Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5
Part 6
Part 7
Part 8
Part 9
Part 10

The night before the surgery I took two klonopin so I'd have a good night's sleep. The next morning we were up early and I took more klonopin (which was suggested by my anesthesiologist). I also took two enemas (which were required by Dr. Colon).

If you ever have to give yourself an enema (or two), might I suggest heating it in a sink of warm water first. The first enema I took straight out of the box and when that cool water hit my bowels I had some big time cramping. It was not very comfortable. The second one was much more comfortable since I got smart and warmed it first, and it didn't seem to be any less effective. Just an FYI.

We got to the surgery center and I had to poop one more time before they called me back. This was the time when I would normally start to get really nervous, since I knew it involved getting the IV and all the other surgery prep. I don't know if it was the klonopin (probably) or the therapy (a little of that too), but I wasn't a complete freak about any of it. To be honest I don't remember much of it. Craig was there, and he says that on a scale of 1 to 10, 1 being completely calm and 10 being crapping out my bowels in terror, that I was a 3. Not bad at all, I say!

Shortly after that both docs came in to talk to me, which I remember very little of also because as soon as the IV was in the anesthesiologist gave me some Versed. Wheee! They also gave me some Zofran because I was a little nauseous from being nervous. Then the nurse came to get me and Craig headed off to the waiting room while I was wheeled into the operating room. Usually I think the patients walk, but with the Versed already in me they didn't want me walking anywhere.

The nurse opened up my gown in the back, asked me to sit down on the bed, and then they put a sticky monitoring pad on my back. I saw the anesthesiologist push a drug into my IV and I asked "Oh, what was that?" and the said "Fentanyl." And that, folks, is the last thing I remember.

I woke up in the recovery room and I was in some pain. They gave me something, but I was in such a haze that I don't remember what. I was also nauseated so they gave me more Zofran. I sort of drifted in and out of sleep for awhile, and they kept trying to get me to eat and drink. I just didn't feel like doing either. Craig wasn't there initially, but they got him soon after I woke up, and he just sat there with me. I went through my IV bag and they hung another IV bag with glucose, saying that I would feel better after I got those fluids in me.

When that bag had run into me I decided I needed to get up and go home. I didn't really feel like it, but I kind of felt like the nurse thought I should be up and out by then. I was ready to get out of there anyhow. I was still a little foggy and in a good amount of pain, but I was able to dress myself with a little help from Craig. They sent him to get the car and wheeled me out.

Craig drove straight to Speedway to get me a Coke Slurpee, and then dropped me off at home. His mom was there and she looked after me while he went to fill my prescriptions. They gave me Vicodin for pain and ibuprofen for swelling. I asked for an anti nausea drug, knowing that the Vicodin would make me feel sick, so they gave me Reglan.

Later that day I woke up enough to get some more details about the surgery. Dr. OB went first. He did a D & C to remove any endometrial lining that had built up. Then he attempted to find the entrances to the fallopian tubes, but he could not find them. So he did the ablation, and then went into my abdomen with the laproscope to tie my tubes the old fashioned way.

However, when he got into my abdomen and had a look around he discovered two things. First, I had a little scar tissue on my uterus that he removed, probably from the C-section. This was no big deal. The second thing he found was a grapefruit sized, blood filled cyst on my left ovary. How this never hurt me or bothered me I have no idea. But he drained it, said it was benign, and it should not come back again. So it was a good thing that he had to go into my belly or he never would have found that cyst. I imagine that if it had burst I would have been in a whole lot of pain.

I now have two incisions in my abdomen - one in my belly button and one in the center of my C-section scar. They are small but quite bruised. My entire lower abdomen caused me considerable pain for the first two days in spite of the Vicodin. Today, three days later, I'm finally no longer sore there.

I didn't get any sort of report on the butt surgery. I'm assuming that everything went as planned. However, I let Craig take a look down there the next day and his reaction was "Oh my God! It looks like someone punched you square in the butthole." I finally got the courage to take out a mirror and look for myself, and he's right. I'm bruised in a place that I never considered would bruise like that. And it's a really dark bruise too, all the way around. Super weird. I also have at least one line of stitches. There might be two but I don't want to go exploring down there right now to find out for sure.

In spite of the bruising my butthole did not hurt for the first two days. This is probably due to two things. One, Dr. Colon said that she would pump me full of local anesthetic down there to help with the pain. And two, I hadn't pooped yet.

I hadn't eaten much since the surgery, mostly because I just had zero appetite. I knew I had to eat something, so my diet for three days consisted of small portions of chicken noodle soup, grapes, and dry cereal. Since I wasn't eating a lot, and I had cleaned out the pipes before the surgery, there was no poop to poop out.

Until today.

It wasn't a lot of poop, but it hurt and made me bleed. It's enough to make me swear off food for two weeks while I heal. However, not eating has made me feel really crappy. I'm losing weight and I feel weak and dizzy. So I've decided that I need to stop taking the Vicodin (since I'm not in that much pain anymore, except my actual butthole) because it slows down the bowels, and I'm getting back on my regular regimen of vitamin supplements. Today I feel like I'm getting back to my old self.

I have one little possible problem. It looks, and feels, to me like I have a blueberry on my butthole again. This I can't understand, since I just went through surgery to have it fixed. I will call Dr. Colon's office and find out if this is normal or not. Perhaps it's one last blueberry that will disappear and never return? If it does come back, I'm going to be very upset. I really do NOT want to recover from this surgery twice, and the whole point to getting surgery was to fix it for good.

So, there you have it. Right now I'm spending my time lying in bed trying to keep pressure off of my hiney. And hoping this is the last blueberry butt I ever have.