We had just gotten home from a birthday party, and I turned on the TV and was trying to find a nice show for the girls to watch while I sat down for a few minutes. Drake and Josh was on Nickelodeon, to which Lily usually says "This is bo-ring!". It was only on for 5 seconds, but in that time we watched Josh lean out a window, only to have the window close on him and trap him in the window.
With perfect timing and inflection, Lily says, "Oh, god dammit! He's trapped in the window!"
Now, I know I should have been horrified. And I was, a little bit. My darling almost 4 year old had just busted out a big-person swear word. It's not like she said "Motherfucker!", because I don't know if she's ever even heard that one (not from me anyway, and when Daddy says that nice one he's usually in the basement alone trying to fix something). But even though it was more nasty than I'd like to hear out of her sweet mouth, I started to laugh. Cause it was funny.
I turned my head away from her, bit my lip, and tried to gather myself. I needed to say something, but if I laughed then she'd think she was being funny and she'd say it again just for comedic effect. When I got it together, I asked where she heard that.
She said, "No place".
I said, "Does Daddy say that?"
"Yes." She replied.
I asked, "How about Mama?"
"Uh huh", she said, nodding.
So then I explained to her that she shouldn't say that because those are not nice words for little girls to say. I told her it was like saying "Shut up" or "Stupid". To illustrate that she got the point, she said "Yeah! It's like saying 'You're not my friend!' ".
Yeah, kind of like that, I told her.
Somehow I was able to give a little lesson there when my first instinct was to laugh. I don't know if I'll be able to recover as quickly the first time she drops the F-bomb. Lets hope she's 25 when that happens so I can laugh out loud instead.
The Harmany Muzzle
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